What I said: Done with the milk?
What I meant: Would you pleeeez not leave the milk out?
What I wanted to say: Stop leaving the damn milk out.
What I said: I need to go to the store (sigh).
What I meant: I have to defrost or chop something for dinner and I don’t feel like it.
What I wanted to say: I’m not really hungry. Y’all are on your own for dinner.
What I said: Are these papers important?
What I meant: These papers have been on my kitchen counter for a week and you need to move them. Now.
What I wanted to say: I’m throwing these papers away.
What I said: Can I make you a sandwich?
What I meant: Do you have to spread the contents of the fridge and pantry across the entire kitchen to make a measly sandwich?
What I wanted to say: Get out of my kitchen before I turn on you with a spatula.
What I said: Thanks for fixing my computer.
What I meant: I love how you take care of me.
What I wanted to say: I’m glad I married you even if you leave the milk out.